Change of plans

Well it is with a sorrowful heart that I say that Matthew and I have had to change the date of our wedding. His work did not allow his transfer and he will have to stay in the bay area for 6 more months to work on the management training. Since it is in the middle of the school year, I would have to take a leave and try to quickly find a job up north. January 2nd is just coming up too fast to try to take all that on and I have made commitments this year at work I feel bad about just ditching out from. This has been a really hard decision to make. I have waited for 36 years to find someone who I can share my life with and I just want to move forward. I know he feels the same. We have talked and talked and the facts are: It doesn't make sense for him to quit his job and try to find something down here when he has 19 years invested with Safeway. I also have my tenure and it is so tough to find a teaching job anywhere in California. So, we are postponing the wedding till June. This is a random thought but it makes me think of the Depeche Mode song, "I don't want to start any blasphemous rumors, but I think that God has a sick sense of humor". I definetly think this is perhaps the hardest trial I have had to endure yet. It's just torture. I probably sound whiny as I know it could be worse. It's just another 6 months right? Sigh.