My Birthday!

So I can't say I was really looking forward to this birthday. 36 was still safe, it was still close to 35, which was still pretty close to 30. But now, I feel myself rapidly drifting toward 40, and I can't stop it. I don't feel 37. When I look in the mirror I think, "Do I look 37?" I heard recently someone say that "they" say that due to advances in technology we are all about 10 years "younger" nowadays than our parents were at our age. So, I am going to cling to that notion like it is the last life vest on the Titanic. 27 is good. I liked 27, and I will like it again. I didn't let myself dwell too much on it though this birthday. Instead, I let myself dwell on the fact that I get to celebrate my birthday with my husband (that still sounds so foreign to me to say, but I like it!)

It started off a really good day. I got to sleep in. Matthew came home for his "lunch break" a little earlier than normal (8:30am instead of 9) to surprise me with breakfast. Yummy macadamia nut banana pancakes with coconut syrup (that we bought in Hawaii), eggs, fruit, and juice. It was delicious. He also brought me home a beautiful bouquet of flowers (sunflowers included) and carrot cake (my fav!). After he went back to work, I had some time to contemplate my 36th year: things I did well, things I didn't do so well, things I need to work on, accomplishments, happy times, etc. I made some birthday resolutions for myself that I know can be, and NEED to be done. Then I got online to check my email and Facebook and was happy to see so many well wishes. That was really sweet. I got messages from some of my brothers, and talked to some friends and parents, who called to say Happy Birthday. I got all ready, and when Matthew came home, he gave me my presents. He had gotten me some new pj's and a really pretty robe, all in green of course! :)

After some nice alone time, we headed off to San Francisco. We parked in China town and walked up to North Beach (the Italian District) to have dinner at the "Stinking Rose". It is a restaurant that makes all their food with loads of garlic. They make an appetizer called Bagna Calda, where the garlic cloves are cooked until they are so soft you can spread them like butter. It is really delicious, but man do you taste garlic for days! Anyway, I had ravioli and Matthew had the lamb, and we finished with garlic ice cream. We had to try it! And it wasn't as bad as you would think. In fact, I think it helped settle my stomach as I didn't feel as overwhelmed with the garlic taste the whole next day, just in the morning. Ha Ha.

After dinner we were really stuffed. Then Matthew decided we needed to hike up to Coit Tower, since I had never been. It was not the distance that bothered me so much as the straight-upness of the hike on a rather full tummy. It is a really steep hike up, but we took it slow, and after I digested a little, I felt much better. The view from the Tower is amazing. A 360 degree view of the whole city. We stayed and looked at all the murals inside. I had no idea it was so big inside, it looks like just a little tower from below in the city. There is an elevator that can take you to the top, but we didn't have the $10 -cash only- it required to go up. It was still a great view. All the walls inside (floor to ceiling) are murals of California history. I am a nut for that stuff, so if you are not - skip to the next paragraph to avoid my historical ramblings. We stayed in the tower for awhile and looked at the paintings and read the history. They were really interesting. You could tell they were done by different artists with different views on life in CA at that time. Some were peaceful and happy, like the painting of the agriculture of the time - orchards and farms with people cultivating the land. Others were more dark, like the painting of the city street where someone was getting mugged and a tragic car accident was depicted among the hustle and bustle of the city people on the streets. They were commissioned during the depression to try to revive the arts. The artists made about 40 cents a week. It took months for them to finish them. It was also a time of communist paranoia, and you can see the artists' political views hidden (in plain site) in some of the murals, so that was interesting to look for. We learned one of the artists mural's was deemed too communist and was painted over. Crazy.


We then walked outside and took lots of pictures of the city all around us. It was a really clear day. We could see the Oakland Temple across the bay from Coit Tower. A full moon was out over the Bay Bridge. We walked around in time to see the sunset behind the Golden Gate Bridge. It was like a picture. The ocean was a deep blue and purplish clouds adorned the hillsides. The buildings reflected the last few rays of sunlight and sparkled like stars all along the steep east bay hillsides. After the sun went down, the wind started to pick up, and it got chilly, so we hiked back down the hill. We took another road down and it was so steep that we could walk almost diagonal and feel like we were straight up. Weird. On our way out of the city we saw a man on the side of a road with a huge sign that said "HUNGRY". I had just made the comment, "too bad we only have all the leftovers..." when we saw that written under that was also written "LEFTOVERS WILL DO", and so we pulled over and handed them to him and he seemed genuinely happy. The food was delicious, so I hope he enjoyed it as much as I did.

I felt pretty content driving back from the city. It was a great birthday. I had such a fun time wandering around the city looking at all the people, restaurants, shops, apartments, etc. It is so fun to be in a city so full of life. So different from the "suburbs". It makes me think about how many people there are in this world and how different their lives are from mine. And probably how surprised I would be to see how similar as well. I think we all want the same basic things in life. Safety, security, fun, laughter, and most importantly - love. I feel very grateful to have so many people that love me so much and who I can love. It does make me feel safe and secure. I am lucky enough to have great friends, a family, and a wonderful husband, that I laugh with, and who I have an immense amount of fun with. Thanks to my love - My Matthew! Thanks to everyone else who helped make my birthday so special. I hope this new year is as good as the last one.

Wedded bliss!

I can't believe its already been a month of wedded bliss. Things are a blurr so I wanted to make sure I blogged it all. :) We got married on June 26, 2009; then had our reception the next day. Sunday morning we took off for Hawaii. Three days in Oahu, and seven days in Maui. It was a whirlwind of adventure. We got back from our honeymoon, opened the presents, packed, and drove to Northern California. We will be living in San Lorenzo, CA for the summer, and then returning to So. California so I can start school in September. Matthew will finish working for SAFEWAY in October, on his anniversary date, so he can secure his retirement and get his 5 weeks vacation and then join me down south.

The wedding was wonderful. Friday started off with me having a migraine headache, not good, I was really worried I wouldn't make it to the temple. I was staying at a nearby hotel with Emily and she ran home and got my medication and then Matthew and his uncle came by to give me a blessing. In this instance it was good luck for him to see me before the wedding. While I was getting my makeup done, I started to feel better. The temple ceremony was incredible. Sitting with him in the celestial room before the ceremony was just so calming and peaceful. I didn't know they had you do that before you got sealed. We were all alone in there, and it was just such a quiet, peaceful time for us to reflect and feel the spirit. I couldn't stop crying during the ceremony and my mom didn't help it any. I just felt such joy and happiness. I felt like I have never felt before. Everything seemed so clear, and though I don't remember everything, our sealer did a wonderful job will all that he said to us at the ceremony.

The rest of the day passed pretty quickly. We were the last wedding of the day so we had the temple grounds to ourselves, which was good, even thought the sun was really too bright for very good pictures. We also went to a nearby park and took some fun photos. Then we had a family/friends beach party. My oldest brother Shawn cooked tri-tip that was delicious and he also cooked corn on the cob. Matthew’s family was happy to get to enjoy the beach (they are from Oregon) and we were treated to a wonderful sunset. That night we stayed at the Hyatt Hotel. We had reserved just a regular room but they upgraded us to the PRESIDENTIAL SUITE! It was awesome. This place was huge! It had a kitchen, dining room, 2 living rooms, a master bedroom, a grand sunken tub (my dream), showers, hallways, sitting areas, fireplace, and a balcony that went around the entire front of the hotel. It was immense. We felt like royalty. Beverly Hills 90210 was filming a party scene at the pool we could see outside our bedroom window. That was surreal. The next morning we ordered breakfast and ate out on the balcony overlooking Huntington Beach in our luxurious Hyatt robes. It was awesome. The food was served on silver trays and it was so fancy. The hot chocolate was the best I have ever tasted. Neither of us wanted to leave.

But we had to leave about noon to get to our reception. The reception was perfect. Sister Koller, from my ward, and my friends did an amazing job on the flowers and decorating. The backyard was stunning! WE had the ring exchange first with a family and a few friends. It was really beautiful. My friend Rachel, who introduced us, sang "When I Fall in Love". We both cried. My brother Shawn, said beautiful things about the symbolism of rings and then both our fathers spoke and gave advice. Matthew and I also exchanged "vows" or basically just said how we felt. It was really amazing. Then we cut the cake and started the reception. The cake was beautiful and yummy. We took a lot more pictures. The food was really good. My older brother made this fruit display that was so cool looking and the fruit was excellent. He is a wiz! Really, I don’t think the reception could have been better. I didn’t worry about a thing. We wandered around and talked to people. I felt so happy. I just had a great time. It was like a huge party and everyone seemed to just be having fun. We left amidst bubble blowing and were on our way to Hawaii!

We spent two days in Oahu. Our room was right on Waikiki Beach on the 16th story. The view was out of this world gorgeous. We had another sunken tub, which I loved! We went to the Polynesian Cultural Center because Matthew had never been, and it was really fun. Maui was the greatest though. We had this ocean front room that was about 20 feet from the ocean. It was so beautiful. It was a condo, so we had a kitchen and we would cook meals and eat on our patio and enjoy the view and watch the sun set. We rented a mustang convertible and cruised everywhere in style. We went on a bike ride down the Haleakala volcano, went to a Luau, did a fun dinner cruise on the 4th of July and watched the fireworks from the boat, drove along the road to Hana (despite a flat tire), and did lots of snorkeling and beach bumming. It is a beautiful island and was just such a relaxing, fun time. I was sad to leave. But also know it is just the beginning of many adventures together.

It was all just so perfect. The temple, the beach party, the reception at the Kettley's, the honeymoon. Everything. It was all I wanted it to be and then some. It exceded my expectations. And I am not just saying that. I really just had such a fabulous time. And I know my family and friends had so much to do with making it all be so perfect. Emily and her sister Marie were angels to me. My brothers and their families were all amazing. My friends from school, Kristen and Jaime, were so great. The ladies in my ward who all helped - just wonderful! And my folks who helped me put it all together and were so supportive - I love them so much!

And, of course, my wonderful husband who was by my side the whole way through and who I know will continue to be. I truly feel so blessed to have found him. Matthew and I just have such a great time together. He has really become my best friend, which is as it should be. I guess I am just in constant awe that I have found this wonderful person to share my life with. And though I am sure there will be many trials and things to deal with, I feel happy to know that I found someone who will weather the storms with me. It’s such a cool feeling.

33 days

oh I truly did think I would do better at this than I have. Things have been so crazy lately. I can't believe how fast the time is going. Matthew has been down here about every other weekend and we have been working non-stop to get everything together. We have made a few changes to our plans for the wedding and reception that I am pretty excited about. First, we decided to get married on June 26th and then have our family dinner that night and do the reception the next day. That way it is not so stressful and we can enjoy the wedding day and keep that special and less hectic. That night we decided to have our family/close friends dinner. I kept looking around for places that weren't going to break the bank and my oldest brother, Shawn, even suggested we should do a BBQ. I liked the idea, but we couldn't decided where to have it. There will just be too many people at my folks house. Shawn said to me, "Well, it's your day, what do you want to do?" And I said, "I want to have a beach party and BBQ tri-tip and roast corn." And so that is what we decided to do. I am really excited about that. Matthew's parents will be down from Oregon and they are excited to spend some time at the beach too. They are not so sure about the whole temple thing. I know it is hard to comprehend it all when you are not members of the church, but they are still being very supportive.

On Saturday we are having the reception in the Kettley's backyard (they are my brother, Scott's, in-laws, and they have a gorgeous backyard. It will be fun to have a garden reception. We will also have a ring ceremony before hand with just our family and friends. Shawn will head it up, and my friend Rachel agreed to sing for us. I found a beautiful Apache poem I want to read and Matthew agreed to write something he will read that I am sure will make me cry. After that we will have our reception and then off to Hawaii for our honeymoon. I am excited because I have never been to Maui. Everyone keeps saying it is just beautiful.

Things are finally starting to come together and we are finding that we are being blessed to have wonderful people who are so willing to help us. My Visiting Teacher printed our announcements for us. Another sister in the ward does flowers and is excited to help us put everything together for the wedding and reception. Another extended family member is going to be our photographer. A friend of my brother Jason is going to cater for us at a great price, and the food is delicious. Of course the Kettley's offered their backyard for our reception. My wonderful sister-in-law is going to come down early to keep me sane as my maid of honor will be on vacation and unavailable. So everything is just about done.

We sent out the invitations yesterday in the nick of time. Funny story about that. We went to take some engagement pictures awhile back and they turned out pretty good. I downloaded them onto my macbook because my dell laptop is getting sluggish and needs some help. Just as I was about to send them in to Costco to get printed my macbook crashed. The harddrive died big time. Don't believe everything you here about wonderful macs. I had only had the macbook for just over a year and barely ever used it because I am so used to my dell. Well, the stupid thing was that the mac erased the pictures off my camera and I luckily had some saved to the Costco sight. However, when we printed off 225 of them and went to pick them up they were fuzzy and horrible looking. I actually looked like I had a flesh colored beard. Yikes. So last weekend Matthew came down and we went to the Hyatt hotel in HB and my mother took some pictures for us. This sounds like a fine idea, but if you know my mom, you know she is NOT a photographer (The first 5 pictures she cut off the tops of our heads). But we gave her some pointers and finally got the shot. It actually turned out ok and since we were behind schedule now, it would have to do. The invitations I got were another hold up. Who knew that putting a little piece of ribbon on a card would be so time consuming. Props to my mom who spent hours putting them together. Then, on Saturday we went to the post office and the lady tried to sell me 200 Bart Simpson stamps. I almost went with it just because I thought it would be so funny. I thought they would just run them through a machine but I guess the stupid ribbon prevented that . So, we got 200 flag stamps and 400 military green clock 10 cent stamps because it cost $.64 each to send the invitations. So, bless my mom again, we stood in the post office for 40 minutes and stuck the ugliest bunch of stamps on my beautifully printed envelopes. All I could do was laugh. We went and got great pedicures and had a wonderful lunch after that (my mother's day present to her).

What a week. I also had Open House which went really well, thanks to two fabulous moms of my students. I honestly couldn't have done it without them. Plus, my student teacher finished her assignment and its nice to have my class back, but also puts me back in the drivers seat. I was getting so much done when she was here! I do miss her. I am glad the week is over now, and I can enjoy Memorial Day with my family. Matthew will be back down next weekend. I am getting used to not seeing him on the holidays (He makes triple time at the store, so I can't argue with that). Hope everyone has a fabulous holiday!

Belated Valentine's Day

Well, last weekend (the 14th) Matthew had his son Derrick, so we decided to reschedule our Valentine's Day till this weekdend. We are kinda getting used to this as we had Thanksgiving a day late and Christmas late. Plus, you can really save on all the holiday stuff buying it after the fact. So, my dear sweetie drove down Friday night, getting stuck in all sorts of crappy traffic and arriving at 10pm with flowers and gifts in hand. He had brought me a dozen red roses, a Willowtree angel holding a heart, a heart-shaped box of Lindt milk chocolates (so yummy), and a cute little stuffed "love bug". Well done, my dear. I was totally surprised and happy. He got a red, pink, and white glittery heart card that I put my heart and soul into because he said he really wanted one, and an awesome (if I do say so myself) foot rub. We stayed up talking and just enjoying being together.

The next day we were kinda lazy in the morning. It took us awhile to shake off the late night and get in gear. I always feel so peaceful and happy when he is here. All I want to do is lay around cuddling and just being together. 124 days till we can do that all day (wink wink). But - we did have a lot to get done, so up we got and out we went. We went to Target to register for the wedding. A lady walked by and stopped and looked at us and said, "Oh, are you registering for your wedding?" And I said, "Yeah" and she got this big smile and said, "That's so fun!" and I thought for a second and said, "Yeah, it really is!!" and that made me realize that it was fun to walk around Target and decide on things we wanted to have in our "theoretical" house. Like: What do you want for bathroom one? Hmm, lets do these cool chocolate and light blue towels and this toothbrush holder with this shower curtain and trashcan. Never have I used so many brain cells on picking out kitchen colors (red and yellow) and then being so happy to find that many kitchen appliances come in red!! We are sticking with my green and yellow for our bedroom and bathroom and throwing the dark brown in for a manly touch. Hee hee. It was a blast to do this.

So, another funny thing happened while we were registering. If you haven't ever registered at Target, they give you this price gun to scan things, but they tell you to scan the item and not the tag on the front. They make this very clear and tell you like 5 times. So, Matthew bends down to pick up this big box of glasses so I can scan the bottom and as he is lifting it, the whole bottom falls out, the glasses come tumbling out and hit the ground in the loudest sounding crash I have ever heard. It was like as if an elephant ran through a hall of mirrors. Within seconds, literally, 3 employees come running over and a security guard. They are all looking at us like we decided to just take glasses out and throw them on the floor. I'm standing there with the price gun poised and Matthew is standing in ankle deep glass and we just start laughing. Matthew says, "This was a set-up huh? You insist we pick it up so you can get us, where's the camera?" Mind you, the workers are not laughing, they are like all tough and saying, "Put the gun down and move away from the glass". And I'm like, dangit, I need to scan it and come heck or broken glass I will scan the product. So the guard guy moves in and gets the scan for me and shoo's us away. Then we moved around to another isle, still chuckling. A semi-crowd is gathering to see what made the ruckus and so we say, "The things you will do to get some help around here!" ha ha

Matthew and I get along so well. It is cool how we tend to think the same about things and can also disagree about things and not get offended. I have heard horrendous stories from guys and girl friends who say that blending the "stuff" is one of the hardest parts of getting married for older people who have a lot of "stuff". Luckily for me, Matthew was ready to get rid of a lot of his old stuff and willing to take on my stuff. He is really good about that, and I feel I am not too demanding about things. I could be wrong. He did tell my dad that he already knows that "yes, dear" are the two magic words in a marriage. I told him it's also the best way to get a "yes, dear" for what he wants most in our marriage. :). . . a home-cooked meal of course, what were you thinking? ha ha

So, speaking of meals, we went to an Italian place called Carolina's in Garden Grove to taste some of their food to cater our reception. We met with Tim and he was really cool; giving us good advice. Then he cooked us up four things to taste, our two favorites are chicken pesto with pine nuts, and chicken marsala (stewed veggies). They were really good. The prices were good, and even though he never brought us the water or bread he promised (hey it was free food, so I can't complain), he did bring us some spumoni ice cream that was really yummy, and we are thinking they will be good to cater our reception.

We are planning on doing the reception at my home ward church, the Westminster building. It will be close, we are planning on getting married in the Newport Beach Temple, and it has the tables and kitchen readily accessible. We are still figuring out all the details, but I am feeling good about this. Originally I didn't want to do it at a church, but then I realized, as we looked at different venues, that although very beautiful and probably a lot less work for us, they were all very expensive. And to be honest, our budget is really small, and I would rather spend that money on a fun party and our honeymoon!

Anyway, we spent the rest of our "Valentine's Day" eating dinner at Chili's (Steak Fajitas tasted so good!) and then going to see Twilight at the cheap theater in Huntington Beach. It was a good, though cheesy movie. Matthew was a trooper to see a chick flick with me. We stayed up again that night talking about life. We are working at spending just as much time planning the rest of our life as we are planning the wedding and reception. Well, I guess there is no way to plan the whole rest of your life, but it is good to ask some of the tough questions and have good, honest talks about hopes and fears and such. Those are the times that make me feel the most love for this man that is so willing and able to talk about the tough stuff and enjoy talking about the good stuff to come. Life is good, except when we have to say good bye. Yeah, that really sucks. He is on his way back home tonight. But before he left he gave me the best Valentine's gift, he got tears in his eyes, hugged me really tight, and then looked at me and said, "How did I get so lucky?" Wow. I guess I am pretty lucky too. Then we had a goodbye kiss that would make Edward and Bella envious.

New Date!

Well, we have our new date set. JUNE 26th! It's a Friday. We will be sealed in the Newport Beach Temple. I am so excited. Things are FINALLY falling into place. I guess the Lord needed to give us a little more time to work things out together. Before we were just so busy trying to do what was best for ourselves. We were both very worried about leaving our jobs and trying to find new ones in this trying economy. But, when we finally started thinking (and praying) about things as a couple and as a future family, our goals became much clearer and we got answers we previously weren't getting. Amazing how when you turn things over to the Lord in faith, He really does guide you. So, the new plan is that I am taking a 6 month leave from work and moving to Northern California after we are married. He will get his 20 years in October from Safeway and then we will return back to the South. We are also hoping to get full custody of his son this summer. His son really wants to be with us, so I think that will be good. His daughter, I doubt, will want to stay with us permanently, she and her mom are like two peas in a pod: a moral-less, ruleless pod. What teenage girl wants to give that up? *sigh* Then, he will work part-time and go back to school to finish his degree and I will go back to teaching. Then we can find him a better job, that he will be happier at, and he can resume taking care of the family so we can (fingers-crossed) start our own family. So, the wait still sucks, but at least there is a light at the end of the tunnel. =) Thanks for everyone's help and support!

Change of plans

Well it is with a sorrowful heart that I say that Matthew and I have had to change the date of our wedding. His work did not allow his transfer and he will have to stay in the bay area for 6 more months to work on the management training. Since it is in the middle of the school year, I would have to take a leave and try to quickly find a job up north. January 2nd is just coming up too fast to try to take all that on and I have made commitments this year at work I feel bad about just ditching out from. This has been a really hard decision to make. I have waited for 36 years to find someone who I can share my life with and I just want to move forward. I know he feels the same. We have talked and talked and the facts are: It doesn't make sense for him to quit his job and try to find something down here when he has 19 years invested with Safeway. I also have my tenure and it is so tough to find a teaching job anywhere in California. So, we are postponing the wedding till June. This is a random thought but it makes me think of the Depeche Mode song, "I don't want to start any blasphemous rumors, but I think that God has a sick sense of humor". I definetly think this is perhaps the hardest trial I have had to endure yet. It's just torture. I probably sound whiny as I know it could be worse. It's just another 6 months right? Sigh.

Visit

Matthew was able to come for a week on vacation to start looking for a transfer and an apartment for us and it was so wonderful to have him here. I loved having him bring me lunch at work and the kids got a kick out of seeing my future husband. I seemed to find a lot of reasons for having him come and visit me by forgetting my keys and the popsicles for our lunch with the teacher. We were able to get some wedding planning done too. As well as take some engagement photos. At the end of the week is was next to impossible to say goodbye. Matthew's transfer has not gone through yet and so we are still waiting to see what happens there. Fingers crossed it happens soon.